Memento Mori

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Seattle, Washington, United States
Professional Darling

Monday, November 28, 2011

† This is NOT What I Had in Mind †


Sometimes, I really love my job. Other times? Well when you're photocopying a whole bunch of documents that you can't unbind from the packet and you have to keep flipping the goddamned motherfucking book over and over again while cutting yourself on the fucking pages...you kinda feel like a slave. [and not exactly what I had in mind.]

So I took 5 seconds out to give myself some sort of satisfaction...and well, it didn't satisfy as much as I thought it was, but it did relieve the boredom for a bit.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

† Training †






I'm learning how to tie knots and to do assorted other things with rope. I have to say that it is incredibly calming to just sit on the couch and tie knots or a series of knots to create something. This thing here is called the Zipper Sinnet. I'm actually quite impressed with myself and my perseverance. Next time I'm feeling anxious I think I'll just reach for the rope. 

Monday, November 21, 2011

Training?



Apparently breakfast is as good a time as any to be reminded...
This girl is actually quite impressed that He could write so legibly on hashbrowns. :P


Thursday, November 17, 2011

AFI - Okay, I Feel Better Now


There is nothing to me There is nothing though there was a time I had felt elation Before all sensation died I cannot breathe I can't deny That I've been feigning for you Every vital sign Defied This means nothing to me This means nothing so spare me the lies I deny you sympathy Just as I have been denied (I cannot breathe) I cannot breathe (I cannot breathe) I can't deny That I've been faking for you Every sign of life I died For the last lie And the heartbreak For the first time I could not take I could not take Till I made you cry This is what you taught me This is what you taught and I learned well To recognize that feeling Easily can be dispelled (I cannot breathe) I cannot breathe (I cannot breathe) I can't deny That I've been faking for you Every sign of life I died For the last lie And the heartbreak For the first time I could not take (For the last lie And the heartbreak For the first time) I could not take Till I made you Show your wounds, I'm bored with mine Nothing is new Don't despair, I rarely cry Oh my Oh, my dear, please dry your eyes Who could harm you? To hurt you is to be despised As I'd love to For the last lie And the heartbreak For the first time I could not take (For the last lie And the heartbreak For the first time) I could not take Till I made you cry Till I made you cry Till I made you... cry Oh Till I made you cry

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

† Longing in Pictures - Day 17 & 18 †


 Day 17

† "Third Avenue" †








Day 18

† "Calculus" †


† Longing In Pictures - Day 16 †


† "Domestic Servitude" †








Perhaps now someone can teach me how to cook.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

† Longing In Pictures - Day 10 †


† "Artificial Warmth"†


*Black bird mug with hot chocolate and marshmallows. The closest thing I can get to being in bed with someone warm while I'm at work.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

† Longing in Pictures - Day 9 - Intermission †





I got nothing for today. Instead, here I am laying on the floor in my comfy old school pale pink granny nightie and my ivory fleece robe. You can't see it, but there is hot chocolate with marshmallows in there somewhere. For right now I am longing for nothing and I oddly feel content despite the writer's block and a slight feeling of loneliness. I would sure like to sleep next to someone tonight, but you know what, it wont kill me to sleep alone. 
Sleep well. 










The Rant of a Blocked Writer

I'm not quite sure what governs my power to write. Is it the weather? My stress level? I'd really like to know so I could address this stupid situation and be done with it. Instead I struggle day in and day out to get some sort of cohearent sentance or structure down on paper or the computer. I try and write on my lunch hours at work to pass the time and to try and get a head start for the evening because I know I will face my brick wall again and again and again. At first I thought it was the medium, maybe I needed to get off of the computer and start to write on paper again. That idea failed as I ended up staring at paper. I've tried what feels like to be everything in my power to get away from the wall and get into that zone where I can type for hours but to no motherfucking avail. I feel like I'm torturing myself by continuing to try and write but if I am just content with not doing anything...what does that say about my preserverence?

So tonight I'm going to try something different. I'm going to pull myself out of my usual atmosphere and throw myself into a totally different situation and different surroundings. I'm going to place myself into a coffeeshop and try and be a cliche. Perhaps it is just a change of scenery that I need?

What I don't understand is here I am, writing this at work and quite frankly not having a problem at all. The words are flowing nicely even though my stream of consciousness could probably use a little more structure. But its working, that's my point. What is it about what I want to write about that makes the brick wall come up in full force? Am I confused about something? Am I avoiding something? What brain?? What the fuck is your problem? I'm pretty sure that yelling at myself is counter-productive, but at least it feels good.

You know what else would feel good? To write.

- D.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Friday, November 4, 2011

Untitled Haiku 1




my tears are draining
grey skies mock melancholy
be my undoing

† Longing in Pictures - Day 5 †





† "I Can be Your Lolita †






--this one is kinda blatant. I'm drunk. What do you expect? For you V.




Tuesday, November 1, 2011