Memento Mori

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Seattle, Washington, United States
Professional Darling

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Like Children in the Dark

I resisted the urge to grab your hand and skip down the street with you;
we could laugh and swing our arms like children playing.
I'd let you pull me behind you, if I struggled to keep up and I'd smile
when the sound of your voice rang out and echoed with my name.
We are hypnotized by the streetlights reflected off of the black pools of concrete beneath our feet as
we watch the yellow lights guide our way through the city of our salvation.
Instead, I looked away and pretended that I couldn't feel the pull of your spirit.

You'd look at me, the way I wanted you to, the realization was
marked in our knowing smiles.
Your gaze pouring a tell tale blush across my cheeks and breasts as I dropped my gaze
and felt the warmth of your touch without a touch of your flesh.
A depth being found that I thought I had hidden away; that I was sure I had locked away.

You will know of me and of what is inside me at some moment when I least expect it.
Time wearing away, eroding the shell I have abandoned myself inside.
When my walls fall away, to crash down upon the winter ground and
to expose my skeletal frailty and the thin pink lines of the scars on my emotions.
Will you be the one that I expose it all to? The one that gets to see what others have failed to?

At night I curl up with my over analyzations and rationalizations.
I pro the cons and con myself into putting it all to rest and just going with it.
Taking my own advice and allowing the palm of your hand to touch the palm of mine.
To feel the warmth of you, of what I perceive of you to slowly seep inside me.
Through the frozen ground water mixed with the darkest sorrow and malcontent.
Past the fear that you won't want to grab my hand and pull me with you when I ask
if you want to laugh and play like children.

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